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Posts Tagged ‘self’

Five Things: Habits I Wish I Didn’t Have

July 22, 2010 Leave a comment

I saw a Venn Diagram that indicated that Habit is where Skill, Knowledge & Desire overlap.  Well, that doesn’t explain these habits that I wish I could get rid of.

In no particular order:

1.) Nail-biting:  As near as I can tell, this is a combination of stress and perfectionism that leads my mind to wander off of whatever I’m watching/thinking of and finds some menial task that must be done before I forget about it.  Forget the financial situation or huge work project on my mind, when the hell did this damn nail get extra long? It’s not clean, I wish I had stopped years ago when my mother threatened to put Tabasco on my nails. (I knew it was a bluff because she never bought hot sauce)

2.) Always having to be Right: Various reports have told me this is one of my most annoying traits.  Supposedly, people don’t like to you to remind them that you have the right answer.  I’m not quite sure why this is, but I am willing to accept the theory.  I have yet, however, to come up with a way to keep my mouth shut when I hear someone saying/doing something #FAIL.

3.) Eating Junk Food:  I know how to cook.  I enjoy cooking. I know what healthy food looks like, and I enjoy the taste of loads of healthy food.  So then why do I eat so many cheeseburgers and tacos and pizzas and fatty fat shit?  Don’t give me the whole “culture of obesity” bit, this is my failed life choice and it’s time to turn the ship around, damn it!  Right after I finish the left over pizza in the fridge…

4.) Awkward First Impressions:  (See here)

5.) Procrastination:  Prime example, I was supposed to write this blog, along with 6 others, last night.  Instead, I put it off and now I’m jamming it out before work while my shirt & pants are in the dryer (because the dryer is how you de-wrinkle clothes when you’ve put-off hanging them up nicely).  How much more could I get done if I just hopped to it?  Years ago, when I was first living alone, I intentionally did not have any television signal, and got load of stuff done.  Bills paid on-time and filed away, books & magazines read faster than I could acquire more, took random trips exploring places in the city just to see what was there.  It’s miraculous what we can get done when I just unplug and go live.

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How you see yourself

June 2, 2010 1 comment

I stumbled across this great picture on one of the design blogs I subscribe to, and it got me thinking…

How do you see yourself?

– in the morning
– when you need to get psyched up
– when nobody’s looking

For me, Monday’s post is pretty true.  I look at myself and I either witness or enforce Awesomeness.

Yes, I know that probably sounds douchey, but I haven’t really come up with a better term for it.

I used to be a shy kid, and still don’t entirely open up around folks I’m first meeting (as discussed here).

Then one day when I was about 16 or 17, during the days when you’re a young boy and you have a “crush” on like a dozen girls at a time and you’re just hoping ANY of them will give you the time of day; I decided to stop being the way I was, and just start being awesome.

Well, actually I decided to start being confident.

Instead of having weaknesses, I figured they were actually strengths in disguise.

Instead of being dorky (think Gifted Program & Monthy Python Holy Grail), I switched it to intelligent, insightful, clever.

Instead of being an outsider, I became the new guy.  Having different groups of friends meant I didn’t have the typical “close, best friends” scenario, but it also meant when I ticked people off I didn’t have to be alone.  I could just pick up and go elsewhere without losing much.

Instead of being not this race and not that nationality enough to fit in with one group or the other, I became Ryan. “the guy with the tan skin and slanty eyes and, oh damn, you see his lips?”.

When I decided that I wanted to move into management at work, I stopped being frustrated and feeling oppressed and started proving that I was the guy who could get things done; because that guy got to make his own rules.

After-all, Caesar said, “it’s only hubris if you’re wrong”.

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This is me, in a nutshell

February 27, 2010 Leave a comment

XKCD: Choices

It’s true.

I have this same quandry all the time. I am continuously baffled by the limitless existance of Choice.

I have equal issues with the idea of Individuality.

It is rooted in the foundation that “wow, I could do all these things”, and the “whoa, so could anyone else“, and finally “wait, you mean that every moron I encounter has the same faculties I do, and this is what they do with them?“.

I also like this comic-strip because in the last couple of years I’ve consistently peppered my speech at work with options of violence, and met pretty good/envious results.

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Awake already.

September 25, 2008 Leave a comment


Played an away game last night and now I’m awake before anyone else. This is usually an awkward time for me because I seem to sleep less than everyone else, and yet, it would be rude to just wake up and start moving about while people are sleeping. Damn sun, hitting my eyes, making me to want to get up and get some coffee! So, to pass the time I thought I’d upload a couple pictures from last weekend. There are many more pics for me to go through, but I really like these two.

Your’s Truely, geared up and ready to go. As you can see, I brought the guns, in case there was any trouble.


I really like this picture. You can almost see my eyeballs.

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First Try, Second Guess?

May 23, 2008 Leave a comment
I am compelled to start my first blog with the traditional:

Hello World!

Well, now that we’ve been formally introduced, why not take your coat off and stay a while? Sorry about the no-coat rack thing; just moved, haven’t finished decking the place out.

Alright, so, though I suppose if anyone reads this they will likely already know me, I figure I should get some basics down on paper here. That is what you do in beginings, right?

– Yesterday was my 26th birthday. Overall it was pretty slow and chill. Not sure how much you can do on a Thursday night when friends that somehow seem to have all become sober. By the way, yes, that means I’m a Gemini and I think it’s pretty fitting.

– I’m 5’10”, I definately need to get in shape, but I can still give you tickets to the gun show.

– I’m probably more proud of my calves that I should be. Wanna take a look?

– I live and work in Central Phoenix. I lived in Midtown for almost 5 years, just moved down to Central & Roosevelt 8 days ago. So far it’s wicked awesome. Just driving around the neighborhood and figuring out which routes to take to avoid traffic and one-ways; still doesn’t relaly seem like I “live” here.

– Sometimes my hair looks like Collossus from the X-Men. I’m actually rather proud of this somedays.

– I am Catholic, though I’ve gone to church less than 5 times in the last year, and maybe twice in the decade before that. Last time I went to church, I took the girl I was seeing at the time and during the whole “peace be with you” part, I totally grabbed her butt out of habit. I like to think JC gave me a big thumbs-up on that one.

– I’ve had a few different jobs in my lifetime (landscaper, errand-boy, ball-boy, burger-flipper, cashier, etc), but I’ve worked for U-Haul now since I was a Senior in High School. Never thought that I’d still be there. Honestly, sometimes I still wonder what it is I “want to do when I grow up”, but for now, this job pays the bills and give me minimal stress.

– Just typing about work right now made me log in to my e-mail to see how things are going on my day off.

– A couple years ago I would have said that Hip-Hop was the love of my life. Now, I’m not sure if it’s just that I’m getting old, or that Hip-Hop has let me down, but my playlist is almost entirely rock these days.

– I have a rule to never drink alone. I’ve given up alcohol for Lent twice already. The second time was much easier than the first, though it’s still tough to say no to cute girls with tequila and surprizingly deep navels.

– I can be totally random and yet somehow still think what I’m saying is totally related. Nothing like existensialism for you, eh?

By the way, here’s a pic I took of myself yesterday. I was at the library and somebody sent me an urgent request to see what I looked like at exactly that minute. Not the greatest of grins, but on short notice it works.